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I cycled 52km to eat cake in a castle

and the other fabulous ways I celebrated my 40th birthday in Scotland!

By Tineke Ziemer

December 7^th, 2021

Forty, Footloose, Fancy-free and Fumbling

In the year leading up to my 40th birthday, my entire life flipped on its head. I'd been married for twenty years, living in our beautiful family home in Canada with my two incredible kids for bffs and our lovable golden retriever as my cuddle-buddy. It was the perfect life and I knew it.

Fast forward, and here I am: single, living alone for the first time in my life, temporarily residing in the beautiful seaside town of Troon in Scotland. My kids are grown-up, moved-on and a million miles away and so is my fur-buddy. It's far from perfect, but it's the only life I've got and I'm determined to make the most of it. If there's one thing that hasn't changed in the past 40 years, it's my tendency to go full-speed-ahead into each new adventure.

Don't get me wrong - there are times that the grief hits me like a wrecking ball and I fall flat on my back, crushed by the weight of it. It comes from out of nowhere: the pounding vibrations of a bass guitar, a familiar piano melody at yoga class, helping my friend straighten her thick red hair. I'm side-swiped, blind-sided, sucker-punched. Unable to breathe or remember that there is any life left to live at all.

And I yield to those moments.

I cry. I rage. I remember.

I have to. They are my tie to all that once was and all that made me who I am.

And then I get the hell back up, remember what I'm made of, and keep fucking going.

There's a quote hanging on my wall that propels me forward:

"Isn't it wonderful that some of the best days of your life haven't happened yet and there are people you haven't met yet who will love you? Keep going. It'll be worth it."

Sounds lovely. And in the meantime... unhealthy coping mechanisms are highly underrated, my friends. Do what you gotta do to keep getting through. ;)

Gimme some lovin'

The day before my birthday, I answered the door to a special delivery from my family back in Canada. It gave me aaaaaall the happy feels!!!

That's how I Roll

It wouldn't be ME if I didn't start my 40s with a crazy idea, a tough physical challenge and a few cuts & bruises. Living alone on the other side of the world means there is no one to talk me out of my big ridiculous adventures. (For all you worry-warts out there, I do have a friend I check in with here and leave all the details for my excursions.)

The day of my 40th birthday dawned bright and beautiful, so I packed my birthday cake into my backpack and headed off for a 32+ mile/52+ km bike ride down the west coast to Dunure Castle. Hey, I only had one chance to spend my 40th birthday in Scotland! It absolutely had to involve eating cake in a castle.

Everyone knows how much I love taking detours, following unknown paths, exploring random back alleys, and taking the road less travelled by. So along the way, when I came across another castle in the distance, I had to find out more. Google maps informed me that it was Greenan Castle, a 16th century ruined tower house. A short detour through a field and along a charming path had me standing next to it on its perch above the sea- or rather, being blown right into it by the ferocious winds.

"Detours in life may lead to discovering places we never knew we loved." - Anna Pereira

As with most adventures, things didn't quite go to plan. Storm Arwen was making its arrival in the UK as I unknowingly cycled on. The winds were frigid and made cycling very difficult. On more than one occasion I was blown right into the curb or the bramble. I had a right-over-the-handle-bars wipe out resulting in my first road rash of my 40s, and I experienced the blinding, stinging needles of a sand storm off the beaches in Scotland. Pedaling into the wind and getting pretty much nowhere made the round trip take five hours instead of three. As the temperature dropped, I was thankful I'd packed a scarf, toque and gloves. Of course, none of this was going to stop me and even when the temptation to take the train home crossed my mind, my stubborn Scottish blood was stronger.

It was a quick stop at Dunure Castle for photos and a few bites of cake (try as I might there was no lighting those candles in the wind - if you didn't sing that we can't be friends), before getting back on my bike and heading home.

It was my birthday gift to myself: my longest bike ride to date. My legs felt like rubber and I didn't know if I'd be able to walk the next day, but I arrived home feeling like I'd done something grand.

"We don't grow when things are easy, we grow when we face challenges."

(For the record, I walked just fine the next day. In fact, I danced my ass off until 3am! Read on!)

Just say YES to living!

I was subsequently informed by my buddy Jamie that I would NOT be spending the rest of my birthday alone. He showed up with a Scottish flag, a bunnet hat and a half-case of beer. We spent the evening laughing our asses off as usual, listening to tunes, video chatting with my amazing kids, and eating a yummy chicken curry.

Just when I thought my birthday was over, my neighbour knocked on the door. When he asked to present me with my own half-eaten, survived-in-a-backpack-for-52km birthday cake, I didn't argue. It's not every day you get a gorgeous musician singing to you in his Scottish accent for your birthday. My advice, when it happens, just say HECK YES!!

This was single-handedly the most random birthday of my life. I received a ladyship and 5 square meters of Scottish land from my bestie Janette. My neighbour, David, gave me his whiteboard with his pens duct-taped to it, a five pound note (which I obviously used to buy dark chocolate), a vase he found somewhere, and a banana (because he says I'm old and will need extra potassium.) My landlord Michael (who is a fabulous cook), gifted me a butternut squash. Yesssss! So many yesses!

THIS IS LIFE, you guys! This is living! Say YES to all the moments, meet ALL the people, make ALL the memories! Nothing is scripted, nothing is predictable, aaaalllll the crazy things can and have happened, but in the middle of it all come these unforgettable stories that I'll be telling for the rest of my life. I consider myself to be one damn lucky lassie.

Also, I'm rocking that bunnet!!!

Let's get this Birthday Party Started!

I was suuupppperrrrrr excited when Jamie told me that he'd booked tickets to a dance in Edinburgh for my birthday! Best birthday gift EVER!!!!!

Saturday morning we got the train to Glasgow for breakfast (top two photos below - breakfasts are sooooo random here! haha) and then took another train to Edinburgh. Four years have passed since I'd been, but I still remember the Royal Mile like it was yesterday. So many good memories with one of my bestest girlfriends back in Canada, Sherrylynn, that the familiar sights made me miss her even more.

Jamie and I had a grand day walking the streets, stopping in at pubs for drinks (even Frankenstein made an appearance) listening to live music and taking pictures of the sights.

Also, Guinness is a hard no.

Jamie and I in front of Edinburgh Castle

BRING ON THE PARTY!!! After a to-die-for-dinner, it was time to dance dance dance to smoooooth reggae beats until the wee hours! Take my word for it when I say that it was an absolutely FREAKING UNFORGETTABLE NIGHT!!!!

Which may have also involved freezing our asses off for ages trying to find a taxi at 3:30am, eating food that had been unrefrigerated-for-too-many-hours because we were so starving, and accidentally video calling my bestie Janette so she could watch me giggle like a teenager and have food thrown at my face. Who says maturity is a necessity at forty?!

After a few very short hours of sleep, we woke up to SNOW IN EDINBURGH!!! Which was literally the one thing I really wanted for my birthday! I may have squealed way too loudly for how much we'd had to drink the night before.

Storm Arwen was in full swing, tragically leaving a lot of damage in its wake. When we checked into our hotel, they said it was a little colder than usual because the roof had been blown off the night before! The silver lining was the beautiful snow-dusted views. We rode the double decker bus into the city center that morning and sat up top to take it all in.

We stopped on the way home for some Thai food heaven and a little walk through the Glasgow Christmas Market. If the streets don't already look like they are out of a fairytale, seeing them all decorated for Christmas is even prettier.

Funny story about the traffic cones on the statue: This is an iconic Glasgow emblem, the equestrian Duke of Wellington, and apparently it's the city's pride and joy. In the 1980s, and rumoured to have begun as the result of a "booze-infused belter of a night out" by some locals, orange traffic cones began making an appearance on the statue. It has become a rite of passage and a local tradition ever since. The city council and police force tried to stop the mischief by making it a criminal act to tamper with the statue. However, their continued efforts to remove the mysteriously appearing cones ended up costing them £10,000 per year ($16,938 Cdn). They eventually decided to spend a small fortune to double the size of the statue's plinth to around six feet tall, hoping this would deter the shenanigans. A facebook campaign called "Keep the Cone" was launched, gaining over 72,000 likes in just 24 hours and ultimately was successful. The cone is considered a part of what makes Glasgow what it is today. It was even switched out for a gold one for the 2014 Commonwealth Games. No one knows who is responsible for continually replacing the cones, but one thing is for sure, it's a tradition that brings laughter and a little extra joy in a world that could sure use it!

This weekend was such an amazing way to start my 40s, all thanks to Jamie! I couldn't be more grateful to have such a close friend here in Scotland.

"A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are."

This reminded me of my adorably-obsessed friend Tina

The stunning Grand Central Station where I have boarded many a train

All Jazzed Up

Day four of my birthday...I woke up after 16 hours of sleep...hahaha...all ready for a candlelit jazz concert on a boat in Glasgow. You heard that right, eeeeeek!!!!

I'd invited my awesome friend Michael to join me on board The Tall Ship at Riverside. But first, I had to find something posh enough to wear. Cue my adorable new green jumpsuit! Only problem was, the trousers (haha can't say pants in the UK because pants are underwear here!) were about a foot too long for me. I decided to go out on a limb and make my own fashion statement, by tying the trouser bottoms into a knot. hahaha. Hey, I'm a farm girl from Canada - this is as classy as I get!

There were zillions of candles on board the ship - truly we couldn't stop trying to estimate how many. The music was beautiful, the wine was lovely and the company was superb. The two ladies in the seats in front of us were clearly having a good time, bopping, chatting and giggling to the music. A gentleman from the audience came up, tapped them on the shoulder, leaned right into their faces and said "SHHHH!" as harshly as an exhale of breath could possibly be. Whoa, remind me not to enjoy a concert in front of that guy! ha! And I sure hope he didn't have covid!

Following the concert, we decided to get some food at a bar in Glasgow and got to enjoy some more live music. The performer sang a version of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" that I will not soon forget - quite frankly he outshone the concert I'd just paid £90 pounds for!

Michael and I were busy chatting and sharing a plate of nachos when a random guy walked up, put his arms on the back of our chairs and said, "Those nachos look soooo good, do you mind if I try a bite?"

Michael and I couldn't hide our shock or hysterical laughter. I thought, why not? Loaded up a nacho with as many toppings as I could fit on, reached over and put it in our hungry visitor's mouth. About an hour later as he and his buddies were leaving, he popped by again and asked for just one more bite. We said, "Go for it, mate!"

Michael looked at me and shrugged, "Only in Glasgow!"

Well, in that case, thank the heavens above that I am here in Glasgow, having the time of my life, meeting well-travelled, fun and interesting people like Michael, who can join me in having a laugh and making a random guy's night a teeny bit better.

Can you imagine though? Going up to a stranger in a restaurant and asking for a bite of their food???? I'm still pissing myself laughing over that! (And that, my friends, is another common British saying.)

"From the moment we started talking, I knew I wanted you around."

p.s. Michael also happens to be my landlord, who I only met in-person because I'd locked myself out of my flat on day five. So glad I did!!! We totally clicked and now we get to go to concerts together, have photography lessons, see how badly we can massacre wallpaper hanging, and regularly eat his amazing cooking!

waiting to board the train to Glasgow from Troon

A blurry but let's call it "artistic" photo of the boat where the concert took place

Girl Time!

By now, I'm sure you'll agree that I'd already had the most amazing 40th birthday imaginable, but it wasn't quite over yet. The celebrations would not be complete without my two closest girlfriends in Scotland, Philomena and Nicola (and one wee baby boy.) We had an extended, talk-till-you-drop, delicious three-hour lunch date at Scott's, a stunning restaurant located in Troon's Yacht Haven. Our table had a magnificent view of the harbour on a sunny, beautiful afternoon. The girls spoiled me with local, handmade gifts (they already know me and my love of handmade so well!) and we chatted about anything and everything.

I had a pretty good laugh reviewing the menu and seeing the single. most. sco-ish. sounding meal EVER. Any of my Canadian friends want to take a stab at what that actually is? haha

"Female friendships that work are those in which women help each other belong to themselves." - Louise Bernikow

So thankful for these STRONG WOMEN and all that we do to continue empowering one another!

If you've read this entire blog post, I consider you a keeper! Either you really love me or you are bored out of your tree.

Turning forty on the other side of the world from my friends and family was only made this spectacular because of the new friends and "family" I've made here. And it's those back at home in Canada who continue to give me the courage and support to make this trip an exciting adventure. Thank you and I love you all!

I can't wait to see what the next 355 days of being forty have in store for me. For starters, Perth next week, Bristol for Christmas and New Year... AND!!!! I'm shooting a wedding in Portugal in June!!! This life just keeps getting better!